Whatever you're going through... don't forget to smile.  You need it.

I just realized that it always rains on August 27 in the Philippines.  Among those that I could remember was in 2010, when we were at Pandan Island in Puerto Princesa until we got into the boat after the island hopping.  In 2011,  I stayed at home all-day because it rained heavily.  And when I decided to have a me-day at Mall of Asia the day after,  I was able to see a closeup view of Manila bay, with the big angry waves  that could go as high as the person watching it (me). It could devour me alive. This year,  it also rained a bit-- and I didn't care a lot.

The weather is pretty much comparable to my feelings.  There has always been some sort of what I call, "Pre-birthday Crisis " or  "Birthday Month crisis" . This year had the biggest share. I'm glad it ended well.

"Happy"  Birthday?  It is.

1. Close two sets of orders 5 minutes before midnight.

Not everybody, but I think most of my friends know that I am into some part-time businesses aside from my regular job. I do not hard-sell, so most of them seems hiding under the cave.  One of them was Bonnes Affaires, a little online shop that my sisters and I put up and manage since last November.  And yesterday,  while online, messages from two customers came in.  And yup,  more than a thousand's worth of  sure orders in just five minutes. Not bad. :)  Then, time-check: 12:00.  Happy Birthday!

I'm eyeing for another business opportunity.  Crossing fingers that it would grow as I wanted.

2. Wake up early -- with a birthday cake and consecutive birthday text messages.

I set my alarm to 8:00 am.  But I got up as early as 6:30.  Someone's knocking on the door.  It was my niece Brianne, with her mom assisting as she carries the Chocolate Mousse cake with a candle. Believe me,  I can't remember the last time I blew a birthday candle.  There's always some sort of get-togethers,  dine outs, and celebrations at home.  Sure there are cakes sometimes, but I didn't feel the need of lighting a candle into it.  It's only now that i realized that it's really a wonderful feeling -- I just didn't care about them using esperma,  one that most people use for brownouts and burials.  Haha!

After that,  five consecutive text messages was received in less than five minutes.  In the height of almost-everyone-talks in facebook time,  I really appreciate that there are still some friends that would spend a peso or a moment to wish me a happy birthday.

The sweet birthday start.

3. Travel to familiar places alone. Then, go home.

Almost four years ago,  I decided to quit my first job and get that job offer near home.  And it's where I am now.  With that,  I lost the humdrum of travelling to the city. Yes, I frequent the metro; but sometimes (sometimes), I miss the frequency that is "everyday".  I also missed Wednesdays when I used to go to Baclaran Church. The flames of the white candles, the pews, and scene of the people walking to the altar through their knees seemed to have missed me.  No,  I missed them!   I am not a very religious Catholic,  but no one has the idea about my faith to Someone up there who's been with me all the time.

The diverse roads going home.  I took the old one.

4. Shed the last tear from the recently-broken relationship.  This time, a tear of relief. Talk to the person who broke your heart -- with a forgiving heart, as if he didn't; with composure, as if you weren't hurt.  

Not everyone knows that I've just been through a tough week.  And I'd say...those who knew didn't know enough (because I preferred it that way).  Don't ask me to tell the story, because I can write another blog post for that.  My birthday is supposed to be our 5th month.  Before that happened,  the entire thing turned out to be one of the whirlwinds in August monsoon.

Some says it didn't show that I went through a breakup. That it was really impossible that I moved on easily.  Can't blame them. I, myself, was even surprised how I got over it.  It hurts a lot to have lost a bondage where I've given a lot of emotion on (even for a short period of time), especially that I was the one who ended it. Yes, I was the one who ended the relationship, but I was never the one who first lost the love.  Then, after a lot of crying to sleep,  I just woke up one day never feeling any grudge and hurt. And sad it maybe, I never felt love either.  This not what I want but I believe that this is what I need. Divine intervention: It happens when you've lost all your abilities to handle things your own.

Then, in Baclaran church,  the last shedding of tears happened.  In front of Our Lady of Perpetual Help,  I cried  -- and I felt relief like I was a long lost daughter being hugged by her mother.  And as I wiped the last drop of tear,  I bade good-bye and promised myself that it would be the last tear I'd ever have for him. That I would only be able to walk away easily if I leave all the baggages behind.  Yup,  I forgave him.

I went home.

The same night, he called.  Honestly, no heavy feelings anymore.

5. Walk, though your feet is hurting. 

My niece gave me a pair of shoes as a gift.  It was made of clear plastic material.  It was raining before I left, so I thought it was the best to use.  And due to a lot of walking, my feet got sore.  Granting an errand for my mother, I had to cross the wide street of Aguinaldo Highway as fast as I could with those exhausted feet.  And thank God, I am still alive. :)

Sore.  Both feet are.

6. Have a full-body massage date....with parents!

Didn't think it was fun, but I enjoyed it.

It has always been my plan to treat my parents to a massage or at least just the two of them,  because they need and deserve it.  Before I made that happen, it was my mom who gave me that birthday gift. Mama, Papa, and I was able to have that ever-wanted and ever-needed massage.  I very much appreciated it. It's when I needed it the most. Especially the body pain was at its worst that time. Sign of old age?  No.  Just blame stress.

Undeniably, they enjoyed it, too.



7. Take a family picture. 

We had our simple dinner in a steakhouse nearby. As always, I loved the food.  The best part is the moment we spent together.

And that very rare moment of taking a family picture happened again.  For now,  we don't have Kuya and family with us.  He was supposed to board to the ship that day.

You may go to places and meet a lot of people. But there's always one set of people you'd go home to: FAMILY.

8. Spend two hours for reading well wishes from friends and acquaintances.  Then,  thank Facebook for reminding them. :D

Almost a hundred birthday greetings.  Not very many as compared to others, but the happiness is enough to cheer me up. Enough for me to believe that I am loved.  Some could have forgotten, but at least Facebook reminded them. ^_^


9.Say "hi" to a butterfly.

This just came up while writing this blog.

There was a brown, little butterfly in my room. (One thing I'm sure of, it's not a social-climber cockroach pretending to be a butterfly. Ha!) It went around and almost touched my face. When Mama went in the room to see, it disappeared. And after a few minutes when I was alone again, it went back.


10. Write.  After all, it was your first love. 

And here's why I was able to write another blog.